Funny Family-guy Saying
Chris Griffin: Where do you think you go when you die?
Southern boy: I learned from church that if you're good you go to heaven but if you're bad, you go to a place where the dead believe they're still living and they pray for death but death won't come.
Chris Griffin: UPN?
Oh, I must give you my e-mail address. It's loismustdie@yahoo.com.
Forecast for tomorrow; a few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom!
Mother, life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get. Your life, on the other hand, is like this box of ACTIVE GRENADES!
This is life. So go and have a ball. Because the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you may not be right for some. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have...my opening statement. Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
Remember, nothing says 'good job' like a firm, open-palm slap on the behind.
Greg, I'm afraid you've earned four hours in the snake pit as punishment. And Jan, for tattling on your brother, you've earned a day in the chamber of fire.
Come, ice cream. Come to my mouth. How dare you disobey me!
I only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
Oh, jeez, I spilled wine all over your shirt! You know what's good for getting stains out? Sex with another man.
Lois, when I'm through with them, our kids will be so smart, they'll be able to program their own VCRs without spilling piping hot gravy all over myself.
Lois Griffin: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
Peter Griffin: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
Brian Griffin: Ah, if my memory serves me, this is the physics department.
Chris Griffin: That would explain all the gravity.
Peter Griffin: Brian, there's a message in my Alpha Bits. It says 'OOO'!
Brian Griffin: Peter, those are Cheerios.
Meg Griffin: You could kill all the girls who are prettier than me.
Death: Well that would just leave England.
Joe, I've had new neighbors before but none of them were half the man you are. And since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure.
Do these huggies make my ass look big?
Chris, everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.
OH! mmm yes oh god this is better than SEX!
Tom, you're so deep in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.
Brian Griffin: Face it Peter, you get competitive about everything.
Peter Griffin: I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.